The last day of our journey together

Ebimisami: 19.11.2018

The last day in Thailand. The last day in Pai and the last day together with my dear Merle after two months of traveling together.
An emotional and above all formative day.

It began with us meeting for breakfast with the dreadlocked Austrian Mano and Ayal, a lovely Israeli, with whom we had done a lot in the past week.
We said goodbye to each other, as both guys were then heading on their way for their further journey through Asia.
This is the moment I least like about traveling. You get to know people, hold them close to your heart, and would like to keep them in your life forever. But then, there always comes a moment when you have to say goodbye and don't know if you will ever cross paths again in life. 

With a feeling of farewell unease and without any plan for the day, Merle and I wandered through the streets of Pai after the farewell.
Little did we expect that the three funky-looking girls with tattoos, chains, and dreads, who suddenly stopped next to us on their scooter and asked us if we wanted to join them at a place where, like every Sunday, there is free vegan food and a bunch of lovely people, would make this day an unforgettable experience.

I believe it was the most beautiful and harmonious place I had come across during my entire journey. A beautiful, wild overgrown garden, in the midst of Pai and yet so mysterious and secluded. In the middle of the place stood a large, round mud hut with a thatched roof, open from all sides and without any real walls. Like a huge grill hut somehow. The children, half of them with dreads, jumped barefoot and screaming through the garden, some people juggled, others sat in small groups on the lawn and under the straw roof, conversing. All the people looked so interesting, alternative, and beautiful that I couldn't get enough of looking at them.

With heartfelt words, looks, and hugs, we were greeted by the people as we entered the hut. Everything was so peaceful, and I was overcome with a feeling of happiness that lasted throughout the rest of the day. When I think about it, I still carry it within me.

Both of us felt so welcome right away, but also in some way so settled that it was almost eerie.

During the communal meal, everyone sat together on the floor, eating cross-legged and chatting. There was room for everyone, and there was enough for everyone.
I sat next to a hippie from Scotland, between 60 and 70 years old, with whom I chatted for a while. After our conversation, which really touched me and strengthened my confidence for the further journey, he disappeared. 

After the meal, we formed a huge circle with all the people. Whenever I looked into someone's eyes, I received a warm smile in return. Probably because I couldn't help but smile the whole time at this place. 

One of the organizers spoke up, welcomed us, and passed around a stick with the topic: 'personal challenges and challenges in life.'
Each of the 50 people, young and old, from all over the world, shared. Some spoke for a long time, some very briefly. There was absolute silence, attentive listening, lots of laughter, and some tears shed. It was incredible how much some people opened up, how close we were, and what wise, different, but also similar fears and worries we carry within us.

I just couldn't believe it. After the already touching encounter with the Scotsman, today's topic was actually worries and fears?! I actually had the opportunity today, on exactly the last day before I embark on my first solo journey and on the day when so much worry, farewell pain, and uncertainty accompanied me, to speak about my worries and fears with such a warm, inspiring, and attentive group of travelers, but also people living in Pai?!

It was so exciting and moving to hear what people shared about themselves!
At the end of the discussion, the woman spoke again, talking about how grateful she is to Jesus for today's gathering. It was then that I understood that it was a Christian place, but where every person, no matter their religion or origin, is welcome and where only the sense of community and togetherness counts.

After the discussion, I was so moved that tears flowed from me. I didn't want to leave. Pai and especially this place were just too perfect, and I wished so much to stay longer. But my visa was expired, and the trip to Laos was booked.
Merle and I hugged each other for a long time and went into the garden. There, once again, without my saying anything, a young guy greeted me with the words: 'Don't worry, Lucie. Everything will be fine. You will get to know yourself in a completely different way when traveling alone and you will never really be alone.' These words also felt like a gift from heaven. 


Later, we joined the musicians who had now gathered together and started a fantastic jam session. Some people just listened, some clapped, rattled, sang, or hummed along.

Full of energy and completely happy, Merle and I later walked to the river, ate cake, and enjoyed the rest of the day in each other's company.
In the evening, we walked, like every other day, through the night market, where we ate the delicious street food of Pai one last time and met the older Scotsman again.
He accompanied us for a long time and told us exciting, but also some confusing wisdom from his beliefs and theories about life. Explaining them would exceed the scope here. However, Merle and I took away something from it and were very grateful for some food for thought. Then he disappeared again, saying that we would meet again in the future. He said it with an emphasis that could not have been more self-assured and certain.

In the evening, we walked to the Paradise Bar, where we talked about the day, which could not have been more perfect, and the past two months, accompanied by a nice atmosphere, a long fire show, and live music, until late into the night.

The next morning, it started at 7 am for me, and the moment had come to say goodbye to Merle.

I got in the van, which started directly, shed a few tears, and distracted myself with beautiful music by Xavier Rudd. 

The next day, Merle set off for Vietnam. 

For me, it was now time to head towards the Laotian border. 

Eyano