Published: 18.01.2019
Savandikaa from Chiang Mai! I hope I can send you a little sunshine with this blog post. Right now, I'm sitting in a minivan on my way to Pai, a small hippie village in the mountains of northern Thailand. Fortunately, I don't have to leave Chiang Mai permanently, I'm only going to spend a few days in Pai and then return to Chiang Mai. Before I get stuck in the hippie village, maybe without internet, I want to tell you about my experiences in Chiang Mai. After enjoying Chiang Mai so much, the city showed me that life always comes differently than you think and challenged my ability to relax after meditation. Why? Actually, my day of exploring Chiang Mai started off great after the monastery. As I reported, Connor picked me up on his scooter and we wanted to explore the city, especially the mountains of Chiang Mai with its temples. James, a Brit we met at the meditation, joined our scooter gang, and to my delight, Josh joined us as well. I wrote about Josh in my Koh Phangan reports, do you remember? He's the English guy who I initially couldn't understand in Koh Phangan because of all his drinking. After he told me his story (his partner committed suicide, his best friend died in an accident), we cried together and philosophized about life, I felt a deep connection with him. And this connection between Connor, Josh, and me was so strong that he also joined us in Chiang Mai and we wanted to spend a few days together. It's a great feeling to be back together with the two guys and not have to handle everything alone. So Josh, James, Connor, and I took off on our scooters and had a fun, albeit nerve-wracking, time navigating through the traffic of Chiang Mai. We eventually made it to the Doi Suthep Mountain, a very famous mountain in Chiang Mai that leads to the most famous temple in Chiang Mai, the Wat Phra That Doi Suthep temple. We stopped at some beautiful waterfalls and viewpoints that we liked. However, when we arrived at the temple, the idyll was over. There were so many tourists there that visiting the temple felt more like a mass production than a spiritual experience. It was impressive to see all the gold and decorations of the temple, as well as the beautifully landscaped surroundings, but I couldn't really enjoy it because tourists were pushing me around. Later in the evening, I visited some smaller, lesser-known temples in Chiang Mai, which I liked much better. No pushing around, you could actually see monks, had time to meditate, pray, ... and find peace. From this, I learned that I won't visit mass tourist temples anymore (thank god I know this before I go to Bangkok), and that smaller, lesser-known structures are completely sufficient for me. What really makes me angry about the huge temples is also the way donations are handled there. Of course, temples need donations for maintenance, so it's perfectly understandable that there are donation boxes everywhere. However, next to these donation boxes are books in which people can write down their donations, including the amount donated. Especially in Buddhism, where you are supposed to let go of externals and money is supposed to play a minor role, I don't understand this. Aren't the people who donate the most the best ones? Money seems to be a very important topic regardless of nationality and religion.
After we were all glad to leave the temple, we wanted to continue driving up the mountain with our scooters to enjoy more peace and nature at the top. Unfortunately, our plan had a setback when James crashed his scooter. Fortunately, he wasn't hurt, only the scooter made some strange noises after the crash. The three guys tried to fix the problem, but couldn't find a solution. Although the scooter was still drivable, James, who is generally an insecure person, was quite frightened and uncertain after the accident. But there was no choice, we had to get the scooter to the workshop somehow. So we sneaked back down the mountain and had to stop several times because James panicked, thinking the brakes weren't functioning anymore. The mood kept sinking, it was hot, everyone was hungry (but we couldn't eat at any restaurant because James, being vegan, didn't consider any of the snack bars to be good), and frustration was rising as it seemed that we would have to cancel our exploration of Chiang Mai at that point. James' insecurity increased as he felt incapable of going to a workshop or returning the scooter on his own. While I was probably the only one who was really annoyed at first (Josh and Connor are among the most relaxed people I know), eventually the guys' mood also reached a low point. After eventually dropping James off at the workshop, Josh, Connor, and I separated from him for lunch (at 5 pm), as the mood would have completely soured during the futile search for a vegan restaurant. Even after the late lunch, my mood unfortunately didn't improve much, I was totally frustrated to have seen so little of Chiang Mai that day, feeling like I wasted the day. It's really shocking to see how much I sometimes react to external things not working. If I don't achieve certain goals, see things, do activities,... I can't stand myself. When things go wrong and I just chill and do nothing, I often don't get along with myself. It's really sad to realize this so clearly on a trip, I hope to learn to accept myself even when things don't go smoothly. So please, feel free to share any good recommendations on how to improve in this aspect =). However, even Connor and Josh were not in the mood for scooters after lunch. While the two swallowed their frustration with beers, I separated from them and took some time for myself. Fortunately, I took this step... I really like the two of them, but I always realize about myself that when I'm frustrated, I need time for myself and then even people I love can annoy me. My low frustration tolerance at the moment surely comes from being too focused on the outside and always interacting with people instead of consciously doing things alone. Strangely enough, I am much less lonely when I am alone instead of being around superficial people. My evening stroll through the beautiful old town of Chiang Mai helped me recharge my batteries. Stops at temples where I felt inner peace and WhatsApp messages to my dear friends back home (sorry Marcelle for the 100-minute voice messages :-*) contributed to that. After some time alone, during which I also allowed myself to cry, my energy levels were recharged so much that I felt like meeting Josh and Connor for a beer in the evening. So we strolled around the beautiful, albeit somewhat touristy, night market of Chiang Mai, filled our bellies, drank a bit too much alcohol (which is surprisingly expensive here, a beer costs almost €2 even in the supermarket), and enjoyed life. The guys actually convinced me to go to a ladyboy show in the evening :D. Why? Apparently, they really wanted to go, as ladyboys are a big thing here (whether I should believe that ;) ). Thailand is generally known for its sex tourism, and in Chiang Mai, you'll come across ladyboys on the street quite often. Maybe that's because, compared to all other countries in Southeast Asia, it is only here that it's legal to be homosexual. In other Southeast Asian countries, homosexuality is still punishable by death :-O... However, on our lucky day, our cultural meeting with the ladyboys in the evening was canceled, there was no show. The guys were slightly frustrated about that (but thank god there's alcohol), but to be honest, I didn't mind :D. Nevertheless, the evening was still very fun, so the next morning, I even had the energy to be friendly to James and splash around in the pool with him (he booked the same hostel as me so as not to be alone). After a relaxed morning in Chiang Mai, I'm currently sitting in the minibus next to Josh and Connor (all slightly hungover, great when you're driving up the mountains with a Thai driving style ;) ) and I'm very happy to travel to the next destination together with these two instead of arriving somewhere completely alone again. So greetings from the three of us and see you soon!!!