Of the foreignness of familiar places

ޝާއިޢުކޮށްފައިވެއެވެ: 26.07.2019

Before leaving Europe for an indefinite amount of time, it was important for us to be in the presence of the people we couldn't see in our daily lives in Switzerland but whom we greatly appreciate. And so we spent nearly 3 more weeks in Germany. For our friends and family, it may have felt like a short visit in the summer. For us, it was the beginning of something new, unknown.


We were fortunate to experience so many beautiful moments. Familiar community. Great conversations. Openness and laughter, but also conflict and sadness. Lots of good food and encounters that we will remember for a long time.

Good mood while camping with our family
Good mood while camping with our family

As it is with people you love but don't always see, you mentally prepare yourself. You tell each other things you missed and reconnect - or you are happy that nothing has changed and revel in togetherness. Either way, you somehow know that relationships change, people evolve, and space and time have an impact on it all.


But much heavier are the familiar places.


It is absolutely bizarre to visit a place where you were always a schoolchild. But now you are no longer one. And the place has remained the same, accusingly - or perhaps indifferently - continuing to exist.


We visited the places and houses of our childhood and youth. Cities where we sat in McDonald's for hours or wandered the streets without money. We walked on paths that had led us through deep crises and beautiful memories.


We walked this path after our wedding. Now, 10 years later, we pick flowers there with our children.
We walked this path after our wedding. Now, 10 years later, we pick flowers there with our children.

Present and past blend together here in a strange way. They fade in and out, overlap and argue. Smells, fragments of memories, people, and colors will likely remain a meaningful soup that has been simmering for years and keeps adding something. Every place we visited was also an excursion to our life stages and the people we were back then.

This was particularly impressive for us in the Ruhr area. We studied here for years, next door to kebab shops, multicultural neighborhoods, and student shared flats.

We lived here for over 2 years. The Turkish men
We lived here for over 2 years. The Turkish men's pub on the corner has remained the same. The color of the house hasn't.

We have so many positive memories of this time. And we had to realize - the place has remained the same.
We haven't.

We weren't used to seeing people who were already drunk in the morning. People who have such obvious problems coping with life that they no longer wash their clothes and can't solve conflicts non-violently. So, that you can see it from a distance. We weren't used to it, and we started to stare - and noticed how the place from our past started to stare back. What's wrong with you?

In all the flashbacks and reflections on the present, in the old and the new, it is good to know who we are:

We are a family.
We are young and old at the same time.
Naive and knowledgeable.
We are loved by God and loving.
Seeking and sought after.
We are now.
And we were.

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