Tag 14: Not only during the Jumbo Jumping your pants get wet

13.07.2016

The night is surprisingly pleasant as the swirling propeller above our heads does not fall down and creates a refreshing breeze. But as soon as the alarm rings, we are right back in the tourist machine. 6:45 wake up, 7:00 breakfast, 7:30 departure for the elephant safari. I am somewhat horrified, as I prefer to take self-determined journeys and see the true experience in the design of the trip. Those who know me know that I not only think this, but also loudly proclaim it at every opportunity to let my fellow human beings share in my good mood.

Arriving at the elephant camp, I see that my worst fears were underestimated. To my horror, we ended up in the middle of a huge Asian tour group, immortalizing everything interesting and uninteresting with all the electronic gadgets in the world. To make matters worse, I had the misfortune of landing on a different elephant than Hetti and Gudi and taking a different route through the jungle.

To downplay the ridiculousness of the events and to bring some variety to my writing, I will try to present the following as a children's story.

One beautiful day, the stingy Gudrun, the bossy Hedwig, and the masterful Matthias set out to explore the jungle. They had to ride elephants because the jungle was full of dangerous animals. Suddenly everything became very hectic and the magical Matthias ended up with three mysterious yellow ones from the land where the sun rises on one of the elephants. In an elephant company of six animals, they rode towards the jungle. In front of the masterful Matthias were Sybille, Brigitte, and Amalie elephant, behind him Renate and Constanze. He himself rode on Elfriede elephant. The stingy Gudrun and the bossy Hetti rode in another company on an elephant named Susi, but they never saw the masterful Matthias because Elfriede elephant went in the other direction.

The masterful Matthias saw a lot of exotic animals on his way through the mysterious jungle. First of all, he encountered Alfred the monkey and also saw Harry the deer with his wife Henriette on the pasture. Unfortunately, the mean and treacherous Maria the mosquito killed the magical Matthias only after she had stung him.

On their way, the elephants crossed deep rivers[1]. The elephant guides stopped briefly in the river and the magical Matthias could observe that they treated themselves to a pinch of power herb.[2]

The ride continued and one of the yellow skins on Sybille fed Elfriede with bananas. She thanked her by picking up the yellow skin's hat when she dropped it on the ground.[3]

After some time, the masterful Matthias saw the showy Ponifazius the peacock, who proudly displayed his feathers. Suddenly, the elephants spotted something gray in the water. They headed for the target and, unexpectedly, the relaxed and clean Reinfried the rhinoceros could be seen in the water. What luck! Next to him lay Norbert the rhinoceros, a very small specimen, probably still a baby. That was exciting!

Happy and satisfied, Elfriede wandered back to the starting point with the other elephants. There, the magical Matthias met the stingy Gudrun and the bossy Hetti, who could hardly believe his luck.

And if they were not crushed by the elephant, they still sweat to this day.

Yes, what luck. Even the most touristy action is fun. But it doesn't end there. Immediately afterwards, we are offered the opportunity to bathe with the elephants. I had already heard about bathing with elephants in advance and have been stating for three days that the camp owners should wash their elephants themselves and that I certainly will not do their work for them. Actually, it's about bathing with the elephants, not about scrubbing them. While Gudi takes photos, Hetti and I are excited to ride the pachyderms and let their trunks splash us. Only the descent scares us a lot, as the colossus beneath us suddenly decides to tip over, causing mild claustrophobic feelings in its riders.

As an extra bonus, I decide that I want to jump off the elephant. Since I am allowed to do so, I have the opportunity to do a somersault from the head of the elephant, a unique experience and finally a sports photo that I have not seen at my university before.[4]

We were also blessed with the opportunity to do a canoe tour on the river. After having witnessed such tours several times and only seeing Asians sitting in the goose position wearing life jackets and armed with umbrellas, I actually wanted to refuse. But by promising not to have to wear life jackets - which would contradict my status as a holder of the penguin swimmer badge[5] - we finally got into the canoe. It was actually a hollowed-out tree trunk that ended just above the water line. After a short time, our guide pointed out that we might even be lucky enough to see crocodiles in the water. I joked about it, as I thought the whole statement was a joke. But no, shortly after, there was actually a crocodile - 2 meters away from us and at eye level! Can someone please introduce European safety standards in Nepal! I even secretly get nervous when I am protected by a thick glass pane at the zoo. However, due to the real danger of becoming sushi for Schnappi, my tough shell was difficult to maintain here.

We spent the afternoon on a jungle safari - this time on foot. My travel and life partner Gudi certainly experienced this activity much more intensely than I did, so a guest comment at this point is probably authentic:

Here we were, in the middle of Nepal, walking through the jungle. Our expectations for this exploration tour initially only extended to a few lizards or monkeys, but we quickly realized that much more would be offered to us. Protected by two guides armed with bamboo sticks and an American in flip-flops, we sneaked through the tall grass in search of rhinos, tigers, and elephants. There was no boredom here: After about 15 minutes of wandering, we reached a water hole. Here, at a distance of 5 meters, we could finally observe a long-awaited rhinoceros. So the tour fulfilled what it promised and we could have started our way back at this point, but we continued hiking. Soon, out of nowhere, our guides exchanged nervous glances. They pointed out powerful tiger tracks in the thick bark of the giant trees and ordered us to take cover and continue silently. Accompanied by panicked monkey screams, we saw a group of deer fleeing in the distance. Both guides seemed tense and did not take their eyes off the surrounding shrubs for a second. They instructed us to run on command. While Matthias followed them carefree as always, my sister's heartbeat and mine could not have been higher. Our token American was now armed with a branch as well. After another sight of a rhinoceros, which I really no longer cared about at this point, one of the guides announced that we would now begin our way back. These were the relieving words that I had been trembling for for an entire hour. Soon we saw houses again and it was clear to me that I had survived the Nepalese jungle with its wild animals. In retrospect, this tour, including the fear, was most likely part of the tourist program. Nonetheless, I still get goosebumps when I think of this march and I am sure that I will not repeat it anytime soon.

Gudrun Bartl, 16.07.2016

Yes - apparently, that's how I come across to my fellow human beings - always the cool and relaxed type. Well, then we are glad that swim trunks dry quickly and blood in the mouth (which occurs when biting the tongue) can be swallowed.

We spent the rest of the day celebrating our survival and letting mosquitoes puncture our uneaten and undigested bodies.

[1] Elephants go down on their front knees when they descend into a river, while keeping their hind legs straight. This is quite scary when you are sitting on top.

[2] Elephant guides on hash - great, very comforting.

[3] I would have eaten the hat of the squawking Japanese woman.

[4] Of course, we know that it is not morally correct to jump off elephant heads. We are also well aware that it is not correct to ride them at all, as Asian elephant keeping and training is a questionable tradition and not necessarily comparable to European animal husbandry standards. It should be noted that we have thoroughly researched the methods of elephant trainers in advance and therefore chose Chitwan National Park, which is one of the most progressive areas in the world. Here, the population of wild animals actually increases every year. Furthermore, we consider elephant keeping and utilization in Nepal as an essential and historical sector of the country's economy and do not want to consciously boycott it, especially after the devastating earthquake in 2015.

[5] In fact, I am even the holder of the lifesaver certificate, but penguin swimmer sounds nicer.

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