Dating in old age... 🙈

I have been present on the popular dating sites Parship, Finya, Zweisam, and Facebook for years.

Not because I expect a lot from them, but because I want to leave no stone unturned! My future is already written for me, whether I'll be single or in a relationship at age one hundred, who knows 🤗... Maybe I'll stumble upon my dream woman again in the supermarket...

I find it interesting that we - both others and myself - go through phases where we doubt ourselves.

What am I doing wrong? Why is it not as easy for a man or woman to find a new partner anymore?

I smile and think of the saying:

"Why am I single? The ones who want me, I don't want. And the ones I want, don't want me. It's that simply complicated!"

From my perspective (!), we can narrow this down as follows:

At a certain age, most people generally know what they want - and more importantly, what they don't want. They are comfortable with their lives and enjoy being single because they can make decisions on their own and don't have to consider others. They don't want to compromise anymore. The tolerance threshold decreases.

In contrast to that - at least sometimes - there is the desire for companionship, affection, touch, and communication. "I like being alone - but not being lonely"! In the past, maybe hot sex was the focus, now the expectations are higher... the excitement moves from "below the belt" up to the brain, where suddenly sex becomes the most wonderful side issue in the world, and values like trust, reliability, humor, and connection become more important. Beauty? Wrinkles? We focus more on the chemistry between people and don't want to deal with people who don't bring us joy!

We become conscious that our life is finite and that we should prioritize quality over quantity.

It should be noted that the first months of my retirement required a complete rethink. I'm slowly getting there. In the past, I lived a considerable part of my life in the future, made decisions, and often neglected the present. Now, I have time, and despite feeling healthy, I am aware that it can be "over" the day after tomorrow or next year. I have to live more in the present and shorter periods in the past - not that easy. But what is easy anyway?

I realize that my expectations - like those of others - are high: I am looking for the woman who is ENTHUSIASTIC about me. Just like I have to be enthusiastic about her! In my case, this may have something to do with humor, wit, and the ability to inspire - but never with looks. Of course, I also have the type of woman that I like to watch walking down the street. That WOW dream woman. But she might be dumb as bricks and have no sense of humor... No. My dream woman shows me this already after the first chat, by touching my heart and making my butterflies dance... and if she is in a wheelchair or has lost both breasts after cancer treatment - then that doesn't make her a second-class human being and doesn't change anything about my butterflies!!

It is part of tolerance to accept that not everyone thinks the same way! That's why I also say "live and let live" and make sure that the people who want to find me, find me. And quickly click away from the people who I don't bring joy to 😂👍

I wish you all a wonderful time!!