Thailand Kapitel 8 - bak to rialiti

No idea what the date says.
No idea what time it is.
I stubbornly ignore the fact that the 5 weeks are now behind us, not in front of us anymore.

Okay, I've 'spoken' it out.
So now it's reality and I still don't know how hard reality will hit us in the end.

Below freezing temperatures. (and even +15 degrees would still be bitterly cold compared to the Thai temperatures)
Rain.
Grey sky.
No scooter rides for now.
Stressed out people.
Spandauer Forest instead of rainforest.
No more monkeys.
Dog poop on the roadside instead of coconut shells and dried palm leaves.
I will miss the shakes.
I will also miss the sunsets.
Instead, we will be overwhelmed by the Berlin traffic and the general noise level, just like we were overwhelmed by Khaosan Road when we were fresh from Koh Mak and passing through Bangkok.
We will have to live with leafy trees, are you aware of that, Juli?
Manno, I want coconut palm trees...
Chill in hammocks and not think about tomorrow.
I need the sea.
And if I can't see it, I at least want to hear it....

If you're nodding your head in agreement right now, I would ask you to treat us with due compassion the next time you meet us.
After all, we really don't have it easy.....😜
Especially Juli - it will probably be the hardest for her to have to do without Thai food.
The attentive reader among you has probably noticed how her palate happily dances when she smells curry... ;))

We were on the road for a total of 37 days, with the first 3 days suffering from severe jet lag.
So we exchanged our Tegel home and our own mattress for strange beds in a total of 12 accommodations on 3 islands & 2 cities.

We survived the completely twisted and loud Khaosan Road without going crazy.

We were woken up by monkeys in the morning and
conquered the jungle on Koh Chang. (or did it conquer us)

We saw paradise beaches on Koh Mak and had cocktails with our feet in the sand on Christmas Eve at 38 degrees.

We had the craziest New Year's Eve ever in Krabi and released sky lanterns over the sea.
Behind us was the most beautiful and craziest rock formation I have ever seen.

In Koh Lanta, we fell into an island wake-coma and had the most dreamy sunsets there, the most delicious shakes, the best snorkeling trip, and the coziest bed of our entire trip.

I killed a whopping 478 insects, but on the other hand, I was attacked by at least 529.

We had good and bad beds, but fortunately without the nasty bedbugs that some travelers unwittingly bring home as souvenirs.
(Yeah yeah, we will only know for sure after we arrive in Berlin, but we were well equipped with NO BITE and always meticulously searched for bed bug traces beforehand....)

By the way, after almost 4 years of not reading, I have devoured 6 (!) books on my Kindle so far and I am still impressed that the device still works after years of not being turned on.
.. (Xeni, I'm back in the world of (trivial) literature, what do you say)

We traveled countless kilometers on 5 different (but identical) Hondas... Had a total of 6 flights in 5 weeks.
(HOW DARE YOU!?)

One of these flights is currently taking place, as we left Krabi and the ocean behind us with a heavy heart 10 minutes ago.
We are traveling at about 10 kilometers altitude towards Bangkok, and before this hectic, pulsating, and above all loud metropolis can swallow us and spit us out again, we will leave it again in less than 24 hours.
We still have a lot to do in the city today, so there won't be much time to mope, but we know that will come, we are realistic.
For now, we are handling it (more or less) skillfully. ;)

Yesterday, when we arrived in Ao Nang (Krabi) after a drive of over 3 hours at around 3 pm, it was so hot & humid - Phew!
It was not particularly surprising that the sky above us completely unloaded in the evening.
It rained cats and dogs.
For hours.
(You see - even Thailand is crying because we have to leave.)
Luckily, we didn't do anything else.
Well, nothing that the weather would have played a major role in.
I mean, what do you do on your last day at the sea in Asia!?
- E X A C T L Y >
You treat yourself to something really GOOD culinary-wise and go........ to........ Burger King...... And because variety is important, two hours later to........ Mc Donald's.... In between, you stroll from shop to shop and try to spot something unique and worthwhile there.
(Spoiler: Nothing there!
At most individual-but not unique)
Afterwards, we waddled a bit into the quite gray and muddy sea that was pulled back very far by low tide and watched the sun disappear behind it.

We didn't actually go to bed until after midnight. Our pedometer app was visibly proud of us yesterday despite the overtime it had to put in.
The alarm clock ringing this morning at half past 5 was really nasty.
But a look at my bank account quickly put an end to the thought of just lying down and extending the trip by another 3 weeks.
Life is so unfair, right? 😌

By the way, we have landed in the meantime.
Also here gray sky and lots of clouds, because we have already sent the sun ahead to you.
It should arrive soon....

Speaking of arrival - before our arrival in BKK, I didn't realize that we would land at the other airport. (There are actually 2)

And there, you have to take a number like at an office, which then entitles you to take a taxi.

Our number was 587.

There were a whopping 120 (!) people ahead of us.

1 (!) hour... We had to wait a whole fucking hour.

For a stupid taxi! 😌

Quickly change the topic....

It is now 10:46 PM and we have already walked over 15 kilometers.
My feet are burning.
Despite the 60-minute foot massage earlier.
Or maybe because of it?! Who knows for sure.

In essence, we experienced everything we had planned to do today.
Without regard for the consequences, we made the most of the day and hopefully tomorrow we will spend our long journey sleeping more or less on the plane. (one can still dream, right....)

One of our first stops was Centralworld.
The taxi driver we got was beyond good and evil haha.
I rarely met such a crazy type.
But I like that.
So I immediately chose him as our airport bringer for tomorrow morning.
Due to various language barriers, we have no idea if he will really be there at 7 am.... We'll see... :D

Afterwards, we had ourselves taken to Lumphini Park.

Because I read that it also houses a few free-roaming Komodo dragons.
Do you know them?
Totally crazy.
And besides, such a large park in the middle of Bangkok is quite interesting.

Water, palm trees, trees, a lot of grass, but the noise of the city and also the skyline were clearly visible from inside.

But the journey there was already nice in some places.

I had never been to this part of Bangkok before.

And there were sometimes larger ferns and tropical trees than in the rainforest.

So the term urban jungle has taken on a whole new meaning.

Actually, in the end, we were able to see a few of the huge lizards. 🦎
Checked off. ✅

But the highlight was actually something else.....

When you hear people from Bangkok talking or read about it, sometimes there is talk of certain 'parties'.
Parties of a very special kind.

And when I was in Thailand for the first time years ago, I was really curious to experience it live.
Unfortunately, for various reasons, it never happened, but this time I didn't want to leave without this experience.
It's like this - there are many 'rat catchers' here.
So tuk-tuk drivers who draw attention to themselves with certain sounds with their mouths, indicating that they can take you to such shows.
Often they also hold a sign up high with the words 'PINGPONG SHOW' in bold letters.
Well.
Let's put it this way:
Table tennis is not played there. (at least not directly)

Do you have any idea?...
No?
Well, here's the answer.

A ping pong show is a performance by lightly dressed to naked women who do all sorts of 'tricks' with their vagina.

They insert all sorts of objects "down there" and shoot them out again in high arcs thanks to years of training their pelvic floor muscles.
Since they often also grab ping pong balls and quick spectators catch them with a racket, the show got its name.
Entire strings of lights disappear into their holes.
Small birds (!) or even razor blades....

The Thais are completely nuts, I tell you!

These shows take place in strip clubs, which in turn are located in one of the 3 red-light districts of Bangkok.

In any case, we were driven there, the tuk-tuk driver took the club's commission, and we 'enjoyed' what we saw.

Well.... Almost, anyway.
We weren't actually there.
(Sorry not sorry.)

But it would have been cool for sure...
Unfortunately, it just didn't fit into our 5-day stay in Bangkok during our 5-week trip.
Oh well, being a tourist is exhausting.
Never enough time for the really important things. 😌😝

But when it (finally) happens, you will be the first to know here.

Promise.🤞

So, dear readers,

for now, this blog is closed.🔚

New adventures are already being planned, and you can be sure that if something follows, it will definitely be a continuation....🔜

Quite atypically for me, I would like to thank my best (and most attractive) travel companion at the very end.

Thanks for always making sure that there is fresh cola in the fridge.
Thanks for always letting me know whether to turn left or right.
Thanks for accepting without much complaining that I sat on my phone for hours in between to feed the 'stupid' blog.
Thanks for tolerating my chaos so well and always keeping an overview for us.
Thanks for being someone I can gossip with so well and for everything else working so wonderfully easily with you.
You are my memory, my hearing & my personal TomTom.

Kop Khun Kha, Babe!

O V E R & O U T.