Gulf of Thailand and the truly explosive stories

Now I'm sitting at the airport in Bangkok waiting for the return flight, similar to almost a year ago in New Zealand. But it feels completely different from waiting in Auckland. Today, people are rushing around, but they are more rushed because they hope that their flight has not been canceled. No one wants to touch doorknobs, everyone wears face masks, but they don't really help at all. In one corner, a tourist was approached, not due to terrorism, but due to suspected coronavirus. Times are changing, although people still panic after the security check, putting on their shoes frantically and retrieving their belongings from the boxes. I don't want to know how many people forget things in the boxes out of stress. So here I am, sitting in the midst of this busy and crazy hustle and bustle. A German from the provincial Black Forest, but this time without pink socks and a backpack that smells like fish from the night ferry. Today, the socks are discreetly blue. Perhaps this more subdued color reflects my restrained anticipation of being back home. I leave behind paradisiacal beaches, pub crawls, parties, daily new impressions, new acquaintances with people from all over the world, or casual scooter rides to view points. Before me lies the journey back to a country in panic and uncertainty, fearing who one might infect. That is also my fear, because I do not want to be responsible for someone falling ill, for whom Corona is really dangerous. It also means going back to a country with a canceled bachelor's ball, interruption of my soccer league, canceled Bundesliga games, and the aim of avoiding social contacts. So the question of whether Thailand or Germany is currently more beautiful does not really arise. But well, there is no other choice, every journey ends. And deep down, after 42 days, one is still looking forward to being home and I'm healthy, so enough complaining. Let's look back together on the trip and especially the last two weeks in the Gulf of Thailand. In the following, I can tell some explosive stories, because I'm back home for the blog's publication. These stories are only possible now, because if I had reported them during the vacation, my mom would have realized what I was up to here. And that would have unnecessarily stressed her out. :D

After saying goodbye to Vietnam two weeks ago (read the last blog, it was really funny), we landed in Phuket and thus returned to Thailand. The route of the trip then led north, as we were flying back from Bangkok. We wanted to visit the islands in the Gulf of Thailand. From Phuket, we went to Koh Samui two days later. The only remarkable thing about Phuket was that it was the first time on this trip that I had to get rid of alcohol in the morning. After that, of course, we rode scooters again. Greetings, Mum. :D

Suicide mission on two wheels

When I write about scooter riding, I remember the first ride in Chiang Mai four weeks ago. We were drunk the night before, and yet the next day we rented two scooters because we wanted to see something, to be precise, a higher temple. The scooter rental woman back then said that the serpentine road up the mountain to the temple is not easy and absolutely not for beginners. Of course, I didn't think at that moment, yeah that's probably for me, who has only ridden a scooter for half an hour in his life and still has a hangover from yesterday. The crazy Thai traffic, where you drive on the left side of the road, adds to it. Therefore, my comfort zone would have been to go there by minivan. But then we wouldn't have been able to stop at the other beautiful spots along the way, so we decided to go with the scooters.

Since the girls had problems with their driver's licenses, Dennis, who wasn't feeling well at all, and I drove. But unfortunately, things didn't go smoothly for me. In the first curve of the city traffic, I was already going too fast and entered the oncoming traffic. Fortunately, I was able to steer the scooter back in time, so nothing happened. But from that moment on, I was convinced that I would die on the journey up the mountain. And Annabell on the back as well. :D

A few kilometers later, to make matters worse, we got stopped at a police checkpoint and were pulled over for the first time by our friend in uniform. According to the two uniformed guys' opinion, we are not allowed to ride scooters in Thailand with our international driver's licenses. Of course, that's complete nonsense, but that's how they make some extra money here. After the policeman suggested that I visit the police station, I stopped telling him that we both know it's a joke and that he could reduce the fine because of that. Cash in for him...

During the check, I also noticed that my helmet was at least three sizes too small and seemed to be trying to compact my skull. Apparently, I'm giving our esteemed colleague S. Z. a run for his money with big heads. As a result, I loosened the helmet a little, which certainly did not optimize its protective function. :D

Fortunately, things went smoothly after the police check. I had hardly any problems while riding and gained more and more self-confidence. And then it just went well despite the hairpin turns and all the shit. Please note the manner of wearing the helmet in the following picture. :D

During the trip, Dennis and I became really good riders and were able to handle the 180 kilometers of the Cloud Pass well. (The fact that I almost got run over by a bus there was not my fault.) Scooter riding once again shows that you feel best when you step out of your comfort zone and master challenges. If you now say that you don't have to put yourself in mortal danger in Thai and Vietnamese traffic to feel that way, you might be right, Mom.

But back to our time in the Gulf of Thailand! More precisely, Koh Samui.

Paradise in Paradise

In addition, there was a beach bar/club next door with a live DJ and a fire show. The party street was also only 5 minutes away. Due to this prime location, Dennis and I only saw an area of about one kilometer radius around our hostel on Koh Samui. But it was so worth it! We spent 5 days partying all night long and recovering on the private beach during the day. I have no idea where I got the endurance to survive that. In Kehl, I would have been done after two days. Unfortunately, during this time, we also blew our frugal lifestyle by spending around 500 € on alcohol.

However, Dennis was not satisfied with every performance on Koh Samui. I quote: in the morning, I read books by Stephen Hawking, and in the evening, I lose against a Thai escort lady (term for Zwalli censored) in Connect Four. Aside from these problems, the time was truly perfect. The people we met were the icing on the cake.

During our time on Samui, Dennis and I actually had all the symptoms of the coronavirus. He had a fever (fortunately no temperature) and general discomfort, and I had a cough. Of course, we didn't tell anyone back home and fortunately got rid of the symptoms quickly. The quick recovery may be due to the fact that one morning, after drinking last night, I realized that I had consumed a bottle of cough syrup during the night. Apparently, a lot helps.

Actually, on Koh Samui, I wanted to see the Ang Thong Marine National Park and bothered my travel group for 3 days talking about how beautiful it is there. We booked a tour for 30€, but it started at 7:00 in the morning. However, since that night was longer than planned, I couldn't join the trip. So it was a lot of stress and money wasted. But as they say nowadays: Whatever!

On Koh Phangan, only the Full Moon Party was remarkable. As the name suggests, this party takes place every month on the night of the full moon. Depending on the season and month, between 5,000 and 30,000 people from all over the world come to Haad Rin Nok Beach in Koh Phangan. It's like a festival and one of the must-dos in Thailand. I would love to post a picture of the party here to visualize it, but unfortunately, I didn't think of taking one at that time. :D

Actually, the Full Moon Party was canceled due to the coronavirus, but even though there were no big stages, the whole beach was still full of parties and people. It was a great experience, but maybe not an incredible party anymore due to the missing stages.

The fact that the focus was more on partying on Koh Samui and Koh Phangan is also shown by the fact that I only took 5 photos in 7 days. But I've heard that the landscape was beautiful.

Our last island was Koh Tao. A smaller island, with 21 square kilometers and about 1300 inhabitants. It is known as a snorkeling and diving paradise and as an idyllic place to relax. We spent two days at a fancy resort and then three days at a hostel. But we were mostly on the beach and by the sea.

Days by the sea

When you feel the fine sand under your soles and hear the sound of the waves. When the palms cast their shade and at some point, lying on the towel becomes annoying because you can't find a permanently comfortable position. That's when you go into the crystal-clear water, cool down, and let the waves carry you. Of course, you always keep an eye out for swordfish. If you're lucky, you can play a little soccer with a football. You have to apply sunscreen several times but wonder if too much sunscreen would affect tanning. If you make the wrong decision during this balancing act, you end up looking like either a participant from my travel group: bright red.

We had days like this frequently in the Gulf of Thailand, but also other cool activities.

The pub crawl on Koh Tao was also tip-top, claiming to be one of the '5 biggest in the world'. I have little to compare it with other pub crawls, but it was definitely the best pub crawl on Koh Tao. :D

It had a fun program with cool ideas, a bar with live music, Thai vodka in buckets that probably make you blind, and in the last bar, it got wild. I wonder if I can maintain this activity at home or if I'll just end up standing at the bar most of the time, bobbing my right foot to the beat. The morning after, I actually managed to join a snorkeling tour of our gang with Robert and Carlo, friends we met repeatedly during our trip. We sailed to several bays, and I must say that the water was incredibly clear, although the fish were not very visible. The corals in many colors and shapes were remarkable. During this tour, we also saw the island, which is one of Thailand's highlights. It was as beautiful from Koh Nang Yuan Viewpoint as in the countless Instagram pictures I had already seen from friends.

But that's it with the islands and our time in Thailand. The day before yesterday, we took the overnight ferry back to Bangkok. It was a nice conclusion to see the lights of Koh Tao getting smaller under the starry sky at night.

While doing so, I was able to review and reflect on some of the experiences of the past few days and weeks and move on from them. From Bangkok, it takes an hour to go to Frankfurt via Dubai. Since I'm almost always lucky, I'm not worried about any entry problems due to Corona.

Finally, I would like to thank the supporting characters of our journey.

Bangkok
Micky, who rented us an Airbnb in Bangkok with an infinity pool that we were not allowed to use, in a building where Airbnbs were prohibited. In our alternative accommodation, Airbnbs were also prohibited, but at least there was a pool.

The corona grandma who drove us coughing to the other Airbnb.

The estimated 50-year-old tuk-tuk driver who stopped to whistle at a 15-year-old Swedish girl who was obviously with her mother.

Chiang Mai
The waitress who hated me.

The team leader from the party hostel who wanted one of our group to run naked around the table after a lost game.

Jimmy, the Frenchman who inspired my dancing skills.

The French Muay Thai fighter who beat up his Thai opponent in 40 seconds, most likely rendering him unable to remember his own name.

Johanna, who solved my problem with the service staff with her language skills.

Pai
The owner of Pai Homey, the most authentic accommodation we had.

• The fake guitar player at the market who pretended to play, which I only realized after three days.
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• Ranger D from the Two Huts Bar, who claimed that I was the best photographer of his life.
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Hanoi
The taxi driver who offered to drive us for 1500 dong and suddenly asked for 1.5 million when we arrived at the destination.

The Indians who simply disappeared during the guided bike tour in Ninh Binh.

Our tour guide who had to search for the Indians in the Vietnamese hinterland.

The boat lady who let me row with her and we talked for two hours without understanding each other. Maybe Dennis or I are now married to her daughter.

Hoi An
Nio, the operator of the Golden Star Villa, which had top accommodation and an incredible price-performance ratio.

Her grandma, who also lived in the guest villa and looked at me with my pink bandana as if I were an alien.

My scooter gang that I led after every traffic light with my rickety bike.

Ho Chi Minh
The receptionist, who was so high and consequently excited that we didn't trust her with our laundry.

Jackie Chan, who wants to work for the American embassy and showed us a local restaurant.

The flight attendant who annoyed Annabell because she couldn't put her backpack on the luggage conveyor belt due to the straps.

Phuket
All Russian families who populated the city and the beaches.

• The boss of the scooter rental, who probably runs a brothel on the side and jokingly said that one of her employees sleeps in this room and I could bring her the helmet all night long.
  
  The discount lady who laughed at my negotiation skills.

Koh Samui
Everyone responsible at Lub d Koh Samui, the coolest hostel we've ever stayed at.

• The team leader of the hostel who talked to Dennis and me for an hour, or rather delivered a monologue, including wisdom like 'we are all flowers and have to fly.' (But also other things that I didn't understand or didn't listen to anymore.)
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  Alberich the dwarf who we always saw in the beach bar/club.
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  The fire show guys who were always drunk from time to time but still cheerfully twirled their fire sticks in front of the volunteers from the audience.
• 
  Jeff, the basketball-playing rocket scientist from the USA who looked like Anton Hofreiter's son with brown hair and was from a completely different planet. On the islands, we coincidentally met Jeff exactly seven times and planned once.
• 
  The Englishman who I almost fought with and his friend with the Mike Tyson henna tattoo who, after one second of stress, stuck his head out of the ground like a meerkat and was ready to go.
• 
  All other close acquaintances.

Koh Phangan
Konstantin and Anja, with whom we attended the Full Moon Party.

The Swedish girls from the club where only Swedish girls were. (It is as beautiful as you imagine)

The English guys from Koh Samui, with whom we coincidentally stayed in the same bungalow village and took the same taxi to the Full Moon Party.

Koh Tao
My toe that bled on a rock.

The English girl who instead of showing a dance move during the competition of the best dance moves on the pub crawl, simply stripped naked.

Robert and Carlo, with whom we chilled a lot and whom we ran into multiple times on every island.

And in supporting roles
My mom, who provided me with information about Corona that I actually didn't want to hear.

The numerous airplanes we boarded recently. According to my calculations, there were 9. It's almost not even worth mentioning...

Thanks also to those who gave me great tips for sights and excursions. Especially my sister.

And finally, thanks to the main characters:
Thank you Annabell, who was our alarm clock, almost never in a bad mood, and had much more knowledge of activities than Dennis and I. You can only wish for such an organized and cheerful travel partner.

Thank you Hannah, who always had good vibes and good ideas and was especially important with her positive craziness. It will be hard to find a more uncomplicated girl.

And finally, thank you Dennis. No words needed, brother. When two people spend seemingly 24/7 together for 6 months in Kehl, Thailand, and Vietnam without ever arguing, this relationship is very special.

So what remains of our trip?

We are the Instagram generation. Always further, more fantastic, more beautiful, and sharing it with everyone to show that we are the coolest. I try not to derive my self-esteem from that. You don't have to go to Thailand to have great days. With the right people and being at peace with yourself, even a rainy day in Karlsruhe in November is great. So no one should feel particularly special because they travel or try to make others jealous. Simply enjoy your great time and don't seek self-confidence by feeling superior to others and showing it. But well, let he who is without sin cast the first stone...

For me, it's good that I can share the trip through the blog. This way, I can let friends participate and tell authentically, thus creating a more complete picture than with staged Instagram pictures.

I have now safely arrived home and was really lucky that our plane still took off. In this sense, thanks to everyone who has been interested in me and my journey, stay strong. Until next time, when the chaotic guy with the most beautiful bandana goes on a trip again!

Lukas