Julkaistu: 19.10.2018
Thursday, 18.10.2018
According to definition, farewell is a separation from someone or something.
But I think farewell is much more. It is also the conclusion of a certain, exciting time.
It is a moment to look back, pause, reflect, and realize that a period of time has passed.
10 weeks have passed. And it is too early for me to describe how I have experienced the time.
Everything needs to be processed. And where better to do that than on white sandy beaches in Zanzibar!?
I have mixed feelings.
On one hand, I am glad and happy to have survived the time in the clinic. I am grateful and influenced by the people I have had the opportunity to meet. I have become very close to the girls and now I am also a bit nervous to continue on my own.
We celebrated my last evening with pizza & wine and I enjoyed the warm hugs!
‘Always see farewell as a chance to meet again.’
My last day at the clinic gave me hope. My host father accompanied me to the clinic director Dr. Pilila and we discussed many points that I had noticed and that require changes. It was a very open, honest conversation without being accusatory.
I was the second midwife here in the clinic after Conny and because of that, the sisters are still quite unfamiliar with 'white midwives' and may sometimes criticize. Many conversations are necessary to make a change and Dr. Pilila wants to take care of that.
It was interesting because he himself understood that German midwives have a kind of vocation, which is why we like to practice the profession and why we voluntarily come to another country to help. It is part of our character how we want to deal with women and newborns.
He knows that the sisters here do not practice this profession because they want to, but because they have no other option. And that is already a big piece of insight. Maybe it is worth conducting job interviews or already considering during the training who is suitable and who is not.
But all of this will take a while in this country or in this city.
At least he was very grateful for my commitment. As expected, I did not receive anything from the sisters. No thank you, no good luck, no safe journey. Although I almost expected it, leaving the delivery room still felt like a blow to the face.
Now it's time to take a deep breath.
And I will definitely write another post on how I assess the time in retrospect. But at the moment, I still don't have the right words for it.